I received a mail from my good friend from England, who visited the Philippines just recently. Apparently, he had a good impression of the Philippines, albeit his usual skeptical view of the world in general. This is an excerpt from his letter:
“…Yours is a third world country, but it is so rich in its own culture… When I went back home (UK), I have told everyone that (1) In my opinion, 1 Filipino is worth 10 westerners (2) I have never been so ashamed to be a westerner (the number of Americans I saw who are roughly 70 years old with a young girl who is just about 25 years old) What is that all about?!? It’s like giving a child a key to a Porsche! I also had the great misfortune to learn all about a thing called ”cherry popping” where a young girl who needs to buy food for her brothers, sisters, mum, dad, granddad etc. will go to a club and sell her virginity for 1000pesos ( she gets 500 and the club gets 500). I was so ashamed that people would take advantage of another person like this, but do you know who ALL the customers are? –Westerners…”
I am grateful that he regarded the Filipinos so highly. I could have left it just as that. After all, I am also getting fed up with the negative write-ups and remarks from some of the most racist people from all over the globe who even have the audacity to broadcast their twisted ideas. Yet, I felt that it’s only fair for him to see “both sides of the coin,” hence this was my response to him:
“…Thank you for regarding the Filipinos so highly. Nonetheless, in as much as I would like to patronize your letter, I am objective enough to acknowledge that there are a lot of idiosyncrasies in our culture that are, to a certain degree, as bigoted, manipulative, selfish, egotistical, or even perverted, as with the other cultures of the world.
You have stayed in the Philippines for three weeks. I grew up and lived here for 30 years.
But indeed, we are well known for our hospitality (generally, but not all), more so if you are a westerner. We are likewise keen on putting our best foot forward (being an advocate of “First impression lasts!”). We are polite and courteous and are usually respectful of the elders, particularly if they are not actually “living with us.”
But a lot of us are also bigoted, for regarding the western culture so highly yet belittling our own; for being obsessive of our personal hygiene yet utterly unconcerned of our environment (except if it’s our own property); for being unreasonably insecured and not exerting enough effort to rise above our poverty; for sticking to religious and political practices and traditions which are apparently made to favor those who have started them– those who are in power, are influential or are simply mad.
A lot of us are selfish and self-preoccupied too because most of us would usually just think of ourselves– of our own pain and misery. Most of us have made elaborate plans for 10, 20, 50 years, yet with nothing whatsoever for the betterment of our neighborhood, community, or much more, our country.
Manipulation is not really uncommon here. Yes, we are a third-world country and yes, countless westerners have indeed exploited our “poverty and stupidity.” But a lot of us have also manipulated them into pitying us, loving us, marrying us, feeding us, assuming our “supposed responsibilities” for our families and relatives up to the fourth degree!
There are also different types of Filipinos: There are the capitalists/businessmen, who would also sometimes manipulate and exploit their own kind, in the name of revenue. The corrupt politicians, who hoard the taxpayer’s money so they can use it to sustain their lavish lifestyle, The working class, who each have their ulterior motives — that thing we call “crab mentality,” when we pull down people when we think they’re moving up and we’re still stuck down the pit and so many others who are too lazy or too cowardly to “grow up.”
AS for those 70 year-old geezers marrying 25 year-old lasses, that also happens here, albeit not as common, since only a small percentage of them has enough money and power to do so. But I bet that if you flip the other side of the coin, a lot of those 25 year-old gals are likewise having the time of their lives (except in bed probably) spending their husband’s fortune. Life is a two-way street.
We live in a sick world indeed… Yes, Dave. I am aware of cherry-popping, female circumcision, arranged marriage, pedophilia, incest, of terrorism, activism, fanaticism, idolatry, serial killings, sexual perversion in all its forms (well, almost) and so many other nauseating facts of life. I have read about it. Heard it. Seen it. And to a lesser extent, experienced it.
I do not agree with foreigners who seem to have delusions of grandeur, regarding themselves as the “superior race.” They epitomize bigotry in its highest form. But I also do not regard the Filipinos as inferior OR superior than the rest of the world…. In my previous mail, I have shared with you the winning speech of this young Filipina who spoke of a borderless world — I agree with her. For me, we are all equal, regardless of status, nationality, color, preferences, norms or mores.
I am so happy that you have enjoyed your stay here in the Philippines. I am proud of those Filipinos who made you regard all the Filipinos so highly. I hope you will indeed come back. My regard for you is as high as your regard for those Filipinos whom you have met during your stay here.
I am and I will always be proud to be a Filipino. Nonetheless, I am objective and realistic enough to acknowledge that there are still a lot of things to be done to make this country a better place. I agree with my friend. This is indeed a country that is very rich and culture and resources. But it is still up to all of us Filipinos to decide whether we are going to cultivate it or leave it just as that – “a third-world country which just happens to have a rich culture.”
Published article: The Southern Chronicles
